Dramatic Sigh

I haven’t posted anything in so long. There’s been both everything and nothing going on, and I didn’t have anything to say that I could get out. I’m still not sure how to even start all this because it’s 8:45 on Saturday morning, and I got roughly 3 hours of sleep after being awake for [...]

No I don’t, even though I definitely fit in a 32D all of a sudden, but I refuse to have 14 hooks on my bras so 34C it is. Is it weird that I keep checking out my own rack lately? That’s weird, right? Yesterday I was like, “If I stand up straight, I almost can’t [...]

I’m ___________________ (noun) and I’m totally _________________ (verb) about it! It’s so _____________ (adjective) that I just can’t even believe it. When my parents find out, they’ll be so _____________ (verb) that they’ll probably _________________ (verb).
Fill it in, Mad Lib style. This is a choose-your-own-fool joke. I have less than zero energy. Pretty sure I’m [...]

I was bored, and I haven’t pooped my pants lately, so I said, “Self, is there a thing that will suggest blog topics to me?” And then I replied, “I don’t know. Here.” And then I realized I was talking to myself, so I just googled it, and there IS. Here are some of the [...]

Last year, I came across a site called Violence Unsilenced. Survivors of abuse, whether it’s sexual, physical, emotional, or otherwise, and survivors of sexual assault write their stories. I can’t explain it any better than the About page, but basically the purpose is to give people a safe place to talk about things they may [...]

It’s also the sound a siren makes but I wouldn’t know anything about that. From today through Thursday, it’s flashback week in this bitch – I’m going to be posting 7 of my favorite blogs from way back in the myspace day. And while I may have originally started this because a) I’m lazy and b) [...]

I’m awesome. Sometimes. Like that time I popped my hip out of joint shaking my ass in my living room. Yeah, I know, someday you too can be this cool. I digress. Often. The point is that, because I’m SO awesome, I’m doing a “What Am I Thankful For” post too, because all the cool [...]

…going places I have never been, seeing things that I may never see again, just can’t wait to get on the road again…
Oh sorry. I just like that song. I made a special character to play it on Guitar Hero. I have too much free time. Way too much right now. Sitting in the airport [...]

I’m (obviously) camping, but there have been way too many ridiculous things not to post. From my phone, because I’m dedicated.
Page: If a penguin falls over, how does it get back up?
Eric: It just flaps. Watch. (Followed by a several minute demonstration of him with knees tucked up, forearms flapping, unsuccessfully attempting to get up. [...]

Seriously, just like Chris has decided to be a speaker and make pornographic business cards (ok, so I think only the first part of that might be true, but I’m really hoping he considers the second), I’m going to be rich. I’m not entirely sure how. I’m thinking I have a few options, and winning the lottery [...]