Dramatic Sigh

Seriously. Ban it. KILL IT WITH FIRE! Or at least require a license to use it*, at least for everyone but Courtni, who gets a free pass on this. It seems like lately, everyone wants to blame “haters” for everything. “They don’t like me because they’re just haters.” “Those haters are just jealous of how awesome my life is.” And so on. Everyone has heard it; celebrities won’t shutup about it, and frenemies seem to think it’s the only possible reason someone wouldn’t like them.

**NEWSFLASH**

Sometimes, when someone hates you? It’s justified. For example, I personally love the super perky baristas at the Starbucks in my lobby, but I totally get why my mom hates them. Neither of us are morning people, but the perkiness makes me a little perkier, whereas it just reminds my mom that she’s awake and it’s not pleasant. I get it. She’s not being a hater, she just legitimately doesn’t like it. But see, my mom doesn’t run around hating everyone. She just hates when people are AWAKE in the morning. She even hates me when I try to talk to her; I’ve gotten more dirty looks and crabby “Shut UP”s than I can tell you. That’s fine. Sometimes I talk to her just to piss her off.

I hate people who think they’re entitled to things. Homeless people make me super sad and I wish I could fix all their problems, but the second they start thinking they’re entitled to my money? Um, no hobo, get out of my face. I almost threw down when a guy on the corner outright demanded that I give him money for his “medication.” When I said no, he informed me that I “better watch out for the rain, because when it comes, I’m gonna drown.” Um, right. If I drown, it’ll be in the ocean that I’m visiting with ALL MY MONEY THAT YOU CAN’T HAVE. Same situation with people who expect gifts for the most minor of events. If it’s not your birthday, your wedding, or Christmas, you have zero cause to expect presents; actually, even expecting them for those occasions isn’t ok. I buy people gifts because I want to, and I love giving someone something for no reason, but if you shove a wish list in my face, you can suck it. It’s rude and completely socially inept to pressure people into buying you shit. Veruca Salt anyone?

The thing is, the concept of “haters” implies people who have no reason to dislike someone. People who are like, “I just don’t like so-and-so because I don’t,” are haters. People who say, “This person does this specific thing and it gets under my skin so I’d rather NOT see their face,” are not. And a whoooole lot of the time, people with specific reasons are totally right. If a room clears out as soon as you show up, maybe reexamine your own behavior before you automatically assume it’s just haters. Not everyone has to like you, true. But don’t assume that no one has any reason not to, because assuming that makes you, well, kind of an asshole.

P.S. I totally KNOW people don’t like me. I know that, in a couple of cases, it’s justified and that’s fine with me. This isn’t kindergarten, and I’m a big girl. But seriously Mandy? Stop talking shit about me, bitch. I’ll cut you.**

*I suggest we have licenses for many things. Using the word hater, having children, being in my presence, etc. Any other suggestions?
**This is totally a joke. I love Mandy more than like, 99% of people who have ever existed.